I'm In Love With My Barista: Ghetto bus update

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Ghetto bus update

I got 3/4 mugged on the bus. A drunk, Irish, construction worker stole my book. The book was titled, He's Just Not that Into You.

7 comments:

Unknown said...: Heya .. I obviously haven't been staying current with your blog.

Hope you are well and dreading the day's to come.

WORRY WORRY WORRY !!!!

blessings; February 11, 2009 at 10:40 AM
Rebecca said...: Ha ha ha..I hope he enjoys that book. It's too bad though - that's one of my favourites. I can lend you my copy. I got it while my cousin was being hit on by a sleazy French-speaking dude at the bookstore in Edmonton. What is it with creepy Albertans?; February 12, 2009 at 2:48 PM
Heidi said...: Ha! Thanks Mochs, but I bought another one. Fortunately it was 20% off so I felt a little better. I still can't believe that happened. Good times living in the ghetto. Ha.; February 13, 2009 at 10:26 AM
Unknown said...: Hey ...

I am/was an Albertan .. and I'm not creepy .. I think; February 17, 2009 at 4:50 PM
TheCGS said...: I'm hurt. That comment hurt me. I am an Albertan. Yes, yes I am.; February 18, 2009 at 2:14 PM
Heidi said...: Actually, come to think of it, technically I am an Albertan too. I was born in Calgary. Looks like the BC girl is the weirdo here. Ya westcoast hippy.; February 18, 2009 at 3:58 PM
Rebecca said...: What???!!!

I am feeling shunned. I think I will go mock hick-farmers with my friendly neighbourhood Albertan-turned BC-er. We will talk about how lame people are who were in BC, and are now in Alberta, and how much cooler the people in BC are. Pbbbbt!

PS. I am SO not a hippy, little Miss "Recycle Anything That I Possibly Could Ever Think Could Maybe One Day Be Recycled Somewhere In The World" :P; February 19, 2009 at 1:55 PM

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Stuff my friends say I shouldn't say to or do around guys (especially if I'm interested)

If your man has been gone for a week and tells you how much he missed you, tell him you didn't really notice he was gone.
Compare him to your old sneakers you've had since grade nine. Mean it as a compliment.
When he gets his hair cut, ask if he's happy that he got rid of his Napoleon Dynamite hairstyle
When a guy is clearly upset, ask him if he's grouchy
In the middle of your first kiss, stop him abruptly and with disgust and a sour face exclaim, "Don't kiss like that!"
Tell him you think he has caterpillar eyebrows and ask if he's ever considered tweezing.
Assure him that even though he's not as attractive as the guys you usually date, that you like his personality a lot
Call him the wrong name
Ask if him if he is a vampire
Ask him if he's gained weight, especially if he's self conscious about this
If you've just started dating, tell him you already jotted down some wedding ideas.
Accidentally call him by the nickname you had for your ex.
Tell him that you're not stressed about the first kiss with him because it will probably be gross anyway.
Zero in on how how short he is. Actually use the term "hobbit".
Laugh when he expresses concern about hair loss, better yet, point out how it is thinning a lot faster in the back
Talk about my granny knee high stockings. Mention that they are beige.
Mention that he doesn't do something as well as so and so, especially BBQing
Tell him I think he needs counselling
React with shock when he tells me his age and exclaim that I didn't realize he was *that* old.
Pee while talking to him on the phone
Ask him to keep a toothbrush at my house because his breath is usually stinky
Tell him I can eat a pound of bacon to myself with no prob
Ask "size" questions
While playing football in the rain, throw mud in his eye
Tell one of my guy friends that I had a dream I made out with him the night before and that it was great (apparently this is awkward)
Tell my barista crush that the organic blueberry bars are always soggy and gross at his store
Ask if a guy shaves his body hair, especially back
Fart, especially loudly or stinkily

I'm In Love With My Barista

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Ghetto bus update

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