1) Rush directly from work, to home, to your sister's truck (Attitude), to the ferry.
2) Leave yourself only an hour for all of this.
3) Try it on a Saturday in the summer.
4) Forget your purse and turn back.
5) Get in the line-up with the slowest cashier and watch people zoom by you in the neighbouring line.
6) Realize you'll pee your pants if you don't use the washroom stat.
7) Before boarding, lock yourself in a bathroom stall with a door that jams.
8) While wrangling with the door, it should snap open and hit you. Awesome.
9) Realize that *everyone* boarded already and you need to run.
10) Congrats, you barely made it. Hungry, go up a deck and realize that it is not the ferry with the cafeteria on that floor. Lame.
11) Return at snail speed to the previous deck amid a sea of wanderers. Hopefully a kid should be screaming.
12) Renew your vow not to have children.
13) Inch your way to the caf. The line is huge and outweighs your urge to eat. Say no to yam fries.
14) Shuffle back to the deck above (arg) to get some peace and quiet.
15) Suckah! It's already full. Sit next to some scary guy.
16) It's loud, so put on your MP3 player.
17) Suckah! Batteries are dead.
18) Resort to journaling.
19) Heh heh... too bad your left your *favourite* pen at work, which also happens to be your only pen.
20) Ask the scary guy to borrow an extra pen. After you ask, you should notice that he's chewing the end of his. Gross. Talk yourself into believing that that is the only pen he chews. The one he gives you, he doesn't... right?
21) Maybe not. The pencil he gives you is sticky, and not just a little bit.
22) After trying to relax, a group of preteen girls sit both beside you and behind you. Awesome.
23) The one right beside you smells like urine and keeps bumping your seat to turn around and talk to her friends.
24) The girls screech and squeal in gossipy delight.
25) Try not to hate your life.
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